A wife who identifies herself being "extrovert" (expressive, joyful and talkative) writes to us about her husband being unexpressive and introvert. On this post you would find our in-detail insight on this matter and a guidance for the wife to see the "bright side" of this and respect the nature of the one who she loves.
✶Query:I am reaching out to you due to my relationship issues. I’m married for 15 years & living in a joint family with my in-laws. Mine was a love cum arranged marriage. My issue is that we are totally opposite. I am extrovert/fun loving/care free/ ambitious/ adventurous/ expressive person and he is lazy/introvert/ home stuck/ unexpressive/ a couch potato. We have slowly drifted apart from each other due to our personalities...
1. Guidance to suppress my basic need of expression of love, care, attention, pamper and accept the unexpressive and lazy husband that I am being blessed by God.
2. Guidance to become strong enough to handle my vulnerability to go out and seek temporary solutions to my deprived feelings.
★ 𝕾𝖕𝖎𝖗𝖎𝖙𝖚𝖆𝖑 𝕲𝖚𝖎𝖉𝖆𝖓𝖈𝖊 ★
You have mentioned a few things about yourself and then about your family/relationship situation.
🌼From your description as it became clear, the fundamental concern is only that your both's nature/qualities are different >> from him being introvert in general, you consider yourself an extrovert. And thus you expect him as well, to express his feelings for you...
There are other things you mentioned, which would influence our response >>
🌻Your both's marriage has been 15 years now. It is that with time, expression of love at physical level is not necessary >> maybe you think that is... but as with everyone else in the world, your husband has his own point of view, belief system and sanskaar.
🌸Since you have come in connection with "Brahma Kumaris" and are watching Videos of BK sister Shivani , you may are yet to learn about the 𝕚𝕞𝕡𝕠𝕣𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝕠𝕗 𝕔𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕓𝕒𝕔𝕪 >> we encourage Purity (both mind level & physical purity) as the RIGHT way of living.
🍀You should see the bright side that your husband does not have the vice of "lust" and his love is not physical. This is in fact, a sign of a lasting relationship, which one should preserve and cherish... Love is to care, to protect, to understand and to cherish unconditionally.
🌾There are many ways to express love & concern for someone >> you can fulfil your responsibility as a breadwinner, as a parent.... and in doing so you do express love. Your husband maybe is expressing love, but only in a different way.
🪴The need of physical love is clasified as a form of vice.... "lust" >> this vice can destroy a healthy relationship >> Go above this and you will see the truest form of love... Tip: Vice is a spiritual illness of soul which keeps the soul attached to compulsion, unease, lower vibration/sadness or sorrow.
1. There is NO need to supress your own nature... if you are happy being an extrovert, carry on... express all your feelings & hold on nothing... "𝓑𝓮 𝓐𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓮... 𝓕𝓻𝓮𝓮 & 𝓕𝓵𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰"... but also you should not keep expectations that your husband (or anyone else for that matter) should follow the same or be just as you are. Just as you love yourself to be an 'extrovert' your husband also loves himself being an 'introvert'. And love teaches us to "respect" each other.
2. Your this question is unclear... But we highly suggest you to keep watching our TV program "𝔸𝕨𝕒𝕜𝕖𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕙 𝔹𝕣𝕒𝕙𝕞𝕒 𝕂𝕦𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕚𝕤" and other general videos of 𝐵𝒦 𝓈𝒾𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝒮𝒽𝒾𝓋𝒶𝓃𝒾