Question Answers

Marriage, often envisioned as a lifelong partnership rooted in love and mutual support, can sometimes become a landscape of misunderstandings, unmet expectations, unresolved conflicts, and emotional distance. When communication falters and trust fades, the strain on the relationship often resonates inward, causing you to doubt your self-worth.

Yet within these challenges lies an opportunity—not only to heal the relationship-bond but to rediscover and reclaim your inherent value. Healing a marital relationship and nurturing self-worth are deeply intertwined journeys, each requiring courage, vulnerability, and a willingness to grow (both together and individually).

Title: "𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙃𝙪𝙨𝙗𝙖𝙣𝙙-𝙒𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙍𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙥, 𝙎𝙚𝙡𝙛-𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙝"

Subtitle:

𝙾𝚞𝚛 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚎 𝚐𝚞𝚒𝚍𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊 𝚏𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚒𝚝𝚞𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚑𝚞𝚜𝚋𝚊𝚗𝚍-𝚠𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚙 & 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏-𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚝𝚑

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✶𝗔𝗱𝗺𝗶𝗻: 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘧𝘶𝘭, 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘶𝘮 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 (𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺/𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴). 𝘏𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 & 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴. "𝙎𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙨 𝙎𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜"

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The following was written in response to a query we received on our Samadhan WhatsApp group in May 2025. So please read the following in the same context.

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🌴The following guidance is based on the information you have provided in your query message. Please read nicely and see what you can follow.

Here is our 𝕡𝕠𝕚𝕟𝕥-𝕨𝕚𝕤𝕖 detailed insights and guidance, touching all aspects of your present situation👉

1. 𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝘄𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗵 & 𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲

Firstly—as we understand, there are a few things 𝐭𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐠𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐞: Your emotions—𝚑𝚞𝚛𝚝, 𝚏𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗, 𝚏𝚎𝚊𝚛 𝚘𝚏 𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜—are valid. Living in an environment where you sometimes face criticism, regular unfair treatment, and emotional inconsistency from loved ones can reduce 'self-esteem' over time.

𝗥𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳:

➥ I deserve 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭, both in words and actions.

➥ My 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 (financial, emotional, household) matters, and should not be weaponized against you.

➥ Silent treatment, blame-shifting, and threats to abandon the relationship are forms of 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐩𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. These behaviors are 'not' healthy expressions of love or partnership.

2. 𝗕𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝘆𝗰𝗹𝗲

You describe a recurring pattern: Arguments → silent treatment → your apology → temporary peace. This cycle can create a trauma bond, where 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 (of being alone) keeps you within this cycle.

𝗔𝘀𝗸 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳:

➥ Does your husband 'acknowledge' his role in conflicts, or does he await an apology from you?

➥ Are you 'respected' for who you are, and your contribution to the family?

➥ Do you feel 'emotionally safe' and FREE enough to express yourself fully?

☘️The answers to these questions is the answer to whether this relationship is based on natural love, mutual respect, and understanding—and whether you are seen and cared by everyone. And of course, before this, must you ask yourself: "Do i give my best to maintain a positive atmosphere? Do i love & respect everyone?"

3. 𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗘𝗺𝗽𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁

Your fear of 'loneliness' and then 'attachment' to your husband are understandable, but these feelings can trap you in a cycle, as explained earlier. So here are our 𝟑 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 for you to "reclaim" your self-worth:

𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗽𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲

As a working woman, you have already built 'financial' independence—now extend this to your 𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞. Write a diary (journal your every day life and write down what happened and how you felt today), talk with trusted friends, and "stay connected" to this divine platform (Samadhan) where you will receive 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 & 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 every day.

𝗣𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗥𝗮𝗷𝗬𝗼𝗴 (𝗺𝗲𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻)

Connect to Shiv baba (God, the supreme soul) through what we call RajYog (becoming 𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕-𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚌𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 & remembering our father, 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐞, 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 & 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡... And in every day life matters, ask yourself before making any choice: “𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘥𝘷𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰?” (or "𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘎𝘰𝘥 𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰?")

𝗖𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀

Politely but firmly—disengage (𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 from the situation & the emotions) when taunts or criticism arise (e.g., “I won’t participate in this conversation”). 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫: Boundaries are not about changing others but protecting your PEACE.

4. 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗥𝗲𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲

When your husband is receptive and 'open to listen' during those peace-moments, try framing the conversation (politely) around "your needs" rather than accusations:

“I feel hurt and isolated when disagreements lead to days of silence. Can we find a way to resolve conflicts without shutting down?”

“When your parents criticize me, I need to feel supported by you. How can we work together on this?”

If he dismisses or blames you, it may signal an unwillingness to change—a critical insight that can help you decide the next steps.

5. 𝗚𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗦𝗮𝗸𝗮𝘀𝗵

A spiritual and deeply renewing way to HEAL any relationship is—sending them your 𝙎𝙖𝙠𝙖𝙨𝙝 (positive and transformative vibrations/thoughts with an intention to 'heal' the relationship)

➤Please read our detailed guidance on our post Sakash (Meaning, Method, Purpose), follow its structure & apply it.

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Helpful Links

Please read & follow all the given links one by one to find maximum guidance:

➤Post: Self-love, Heal Hurt, End Attachments

➤Post: Healing a 'Family situation'

➤Post: Overcoming Emotional Hurt

🍎The best way to get "constant guidance" is to follow our series episodes on "Healing & managing Relationships" in a variety of situations and cases. The series is under our popular TV program 𝘼𝙬𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝘽𝙧𝙖𝙝𝙢𝙖 𝙆𝙪𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙨 hosted by BK sister Shivani.

➤Series one ('𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬')

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6mmKavEt551HqVGwRL1hqVi9TQD-03Hp

➤Series two ('𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭')

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsc5xwFxdoFzdVvaHu2Uhw2X-k9ecVGlR

☝️Watch both series from above shared playlists. Watch regularly to keep yourself on the path and feel motivated.

✶𝗔𝗱𝗺𝗶𝗻: 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘧𝘶𝘭, 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘶𝘮 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 (𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺/𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴). 𝘏𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 & 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴. "𝙎𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙨 𝙎𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜"

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𝐵𝑒 𝐵𝓁𝑒𝓈𝓈𝑒𝒹..✨

Oᑎ ᘜOᗪᒪY SᗴᖇᐯIᑕᗴ,

𝕸𝖆𝖓𝖆𝖌𝖊𝖗, 𝕾𝖆𝖒𝖆𝖉𝖍𝖆𝖓, 𝕾𝖍𝖎𝖛 𝕭𝖆𝖇𝖆 𝕾𝖊𝖗𝖛𝖎𝖈𝖊𝖘 𝕴𝖓𝖎𝖙𝖎𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖛𝖊 (SBSI)