This is the advise given to all the parents who resist the decision of their children to marry according to their choices in other caste. What is best to be done? Here is the step by step spiritual healing. And a way to find peace in the parents - child relationship.
Original Email received from you
Hi Didi, I have a question.
I am a very conservative and traditional hindu. I come from a family where we practiced a lot of pooja and katha at home. Both my kids are atheist. They are oppose to marrying in the same faith. For them love is the priority and they can settle with other races. They both are dating from other races. Me, being so religious and conservative it really bothers me. What can I tell myself so I get peace or how can I handle this situation?
Your email is received and read. Here is our response and advice for you.
First of all we must clear our minds with the very true fact that 'Our Karma leads us to our Destiny'. No matter what we plan, decide, or foresee but our past karma will reap what we have sown.. So everyone we meet through the journey of our lives are the product of our Karmic Accounts.
Only a Gyani and Yogi have the power to turn their Destiny because they have Shivbaba and power of Yog. But there's an exception to this too i.e the Gyan of Drama.. what is fixed in Drama will happen.
As far as the choices of your children are considered.. You must keep this in your mind that their (your children's) karmic accounts will pull them to the path of settlement.. So be it a marriage in other caste or whatsoever like that. You are here powerless. You can't control anyone but yourself.. you can only control and change the line of your own thoughts.. You can't interfere in anyone else's Karmic Accounts.
We understand, as you said, you belong to conservative Hindu background and it becomes difficult to accept leave alone intercaste marriages but even love marriages.
To find more guidance, we advice you to search our forum (this forum) using the search box - search for related posts that will further guide you.
You must understand and accept lovingly everyone because we are all are souls. Every soul in the world are child of one God ( incorporeal God Shiva). So please don't tangle yourself with the thoughts that you are very religious, belong to upper/lower/middle hindu class etc.. These are the titles of body.
Your 'to be daughter in law or son in law from other caste' are a Soul. And if your children choose to marry them - it is their Karmic Accounts pulling them.. and at the end parents want their children to be happy.. So you should not go against your kids. Let them choose.
We understand, there are a lot of insecurities related with inter-caste marriages-
1. Culture and upbringing of other soul
2. Food habits (veg/non veg)
3. Less or no knowledge of family's background
4. No power to control an adverse situation, as is no common relative/intermediary, in case of some issues
5. For the male family, no or less dowry (though dowry system is banned) & is the wife of adjusting nature or not?
6. For females, if other family is safe for her and is accepting her?
7. What other people in our society say or think or react about this?
They may be other reason bothering you or some of these.
Visit: Day to Day timetable to learn about our lifestyle which you can also adopt and see the transformation in life.
Well marriages in same caste are also no guarantee nowadays because it is kaliyug, the end period of Drama.. What is bound to happen will happen..
I've personally seen many same caste marriages failing and leading to divorce.
If other family's parents are against the marriage then you should counsel your kids. But If everyone is okay with it then you can let it.
But the need of the hour, for now, is to be Happy and Content. You must not disturb your state of mind. You are a Soul, consider yourself a Soul and accept lovingly everyone who is going to be part of your family.
Do also watch these videos :
Please watch given videos.
Also, You also should visit brahma kumaris center and take the 7 days free rajyoga meditation course.. you'll feel powerful about dealing with your own self and others...