Parenting A Difficult Child

Here is our complete (detailed) guidance for parents whose children shows sign of hyperactivity, lack of respect or ill-behavior that is harming their own growth. Parents (mother & father) are the first teachers of a child. You can help your child to HEAL with the spiritual wisdom we shared here and with a balance of love and discipline. Please read this post till the end.

Title: "𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝘼 𝘿𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙩 𝘾𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙"

Subtitle: 𝙻𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚗 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚎𝚊𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑, 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚕, 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚊 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚘𝚛 𝚒𝚕𝚕-𝚋𝚎𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚞𝚊𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚜𝚍𝚘𝚖, 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 & 𝚞𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚕𝚊𝚠

✶𝗔𝗱𝗺𝗶𝗻: 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘧𝘶𝘭, 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘶𝘮 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 (𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺/𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴). 𝘏𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦. "𝙎𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙨 𝙎𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜"

* Foreword (introduction)

* What does a good parent do?

* Children Are Painting

* STEP ONE (be example)

* STEP TWO (be wise)

* Useful links

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Firstly, we highly recommend you to also read our recent response titled "𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙍𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙥 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝘿𝙖𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙚𝙧" (originally written as a response to a query on our Samadhan WhatsApp group in May 2024)

Foreword

As we can observe, 𝕡𝕒𝕣𝕖𝕟𝕥-𝕔𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕕𝕣𝕖𝕟 relationship in today's time is can very easily be spoiled—because of many reasons. Mainly because of children's world expanding from an early age...as they make 𝕗𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕕𝕤 at school, and the entire world being accessible to them through the 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚗𝚎𝚝. You see... the more 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬 we make, the quicker we detach from the relationships we already hold. This is basic human nature. It is important that parents restrict the use of phone and internet for children from an early age, not let them be habitual of it, and teach the right use of internet. Remember: More than your words, children will follow your actions and behavior.

☘️The main issue that comes up through your message is—𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝'𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. He has not seen a difficult time, and thus takes for granted everything given to him.

𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗮 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗱𝗼?

𝔸𝕟𝕤𝕨𝕖𝕣: A good parent would definitely love their child, but in the right way. They will not spoil the child with everything provided at ease and thus not let the child learn the basic lessons of life.

🌈The good lessons of life are learned 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬, 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲. All this makes us 𝙝𝙪𝙢𝙗𝙡𝙚, 𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙚, 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙞𝙗𝙡𝙚, 𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙖𝙣𝙞𝙨𝙚𝙙, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜. These are the real lessons and treasures for the soul.

You must have heard the old axiom: "𝘊𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴". The more 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲, 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 the painter gives to their painting, the more beautiful the painting comes out. Parenting is just that.

Just as a painting begins with a blank canvas, children start their lives full of potential, shaped by the experiences, guidance, and love they receive. Like the careful brushstrokes of an artist, every interaction, lesson, and moment of play contributes to the development of a child's character and personality.

𝗕𝗲 𝗮𝗻 𝗲𝘅𝗮𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗻

🍁There is no better way of teaching than to "become an example" yourself. Children may not listen to their parents all the time, but 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰/𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐝𝐨, in one way or another. This is the reason we can observe that children who are raised in a 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚙𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚒𝚋𝚕𝚎 𝚏𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚢 grows up to be 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝, 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞. The same is true for children who saw their parents in conflict, or seen irresponsible parenting. Such children will seek the "love" from outside, the love which they should first get from the parents.

🍇Do you understand now? Do you see that your painting is not a bad one, but only needs finishing with some beautiful 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐣𝐨𝐲, 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐝𝐨𝐦. Do you see that you can do all this just by giving time to your painting?

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🍀Advice: 𝐒𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐦... 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞... 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞. Even if he resist or does anything you may not like, jut do not react and keep listening.

🍎As you become good friends, your son himself will come to you for your guidance. There will be no need to force him. And you can never force him anyway. When there is TRUTH, LOVE & TRUST in your relationship, 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰.

🪻Remember these 3 attributes: 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙩𝙝, 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚, 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙩. All your 𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕤 and 𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕚𝕔𝕖𝕤 in any form of relationship (not just this one) should be sourced from truth, love, and trust. 𝐁𝐞 𝐚 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 and give the right advice in a way your child can understand and follow.

🪴You see... doing all this will not only benefit your child, but also YOU... you are learning deep wisdom of "parenting" through this process... and you are giving this wisdom also to your son.

𝙈𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙙𝙜𝙚 𝙝𝙚/𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙞𝙨

It is very important for them to KNOW how privileged they are compared to children born to poor parents and the orphans. You can do this by showing VIDEOS available on YouTube... videos of orphanage children, videos of life's struggle, and mostly the 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐨𝐬 of people who overcame the struggles. Motivational speakers like 𝐒𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐌𝐚𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐢, 𝐃𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐤 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐫𝐚, 𝐆𝐚𝐮𝐫 𝐆𝐨𝐩𝐚𝐥 𝐃𝐚𝐬, 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐯 𝐊𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐚, etc can help (please search them yourself)

🌻Besides, you can surely 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝘁𝗼 𝘃𝗶𝘀𝗶𝘁 𝗮 𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗮𝗹 𝗼𝗿𝗽𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗮𝗴𝗲. This would be much more impactful, as he will see for himself how the children live without parents. No words will be needed.

✶𝗥𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿: Your intention should NOT be to teach him a lesson, but give him the right parenting with love and care. Do not treat them like a patient, but like a dear child, a student, and a friend.

Do what you do with awareness of WHAT and WHY you are doing it... what is your INTENTION? and what is your PURPOSE?

☝️This may sound light, but this is 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚏𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚒𝚜𝚍𝚘𝚖 𝚘𝚏 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 that if you could follow accurately in everyday life, can bring you great fulfilment.

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𝗨𝘀𝗲𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗟𝗶𝗻𝗸𝘀

I have found a good article for you👉MUST READ this 𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝟭𝟬 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗶𝗽𝘀 👉 https://www.indiaparenting.com/top-10-positive-parenting-tips-every-parent-must-follow.html

Also read our forum post: 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫-𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞👉 https://www.shivbabas.org/forum/question-answers/parenting-of-a-child-with-anger-issue

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𝐵𝓁𝑒𝓈𝓈𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈...

Oᑎ ᘜOᗪᒪY SᗴᖇᐯIᑕᗴ,

𝕸𝖆𝖓𝖆𝖌𝖊𝖗, 𝕾𝖆𝖒𝖆𝖉𝖍𝖆𝖓, 𝕾𝖍𝖎𝖛 𝕭𝖆𝖇𝖆 𝕾𝖊𝖗𝖛𝖎𝖈𝖊𝖘 𝕴𝖓𝖎𝖙𝖎𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖛𝖊 (SBSI)