Letter email was received in Oct 2018 from Sneha. About: How to overcome jealousy and how to build healthy husband wife relationship?
I am following you from last 3-4 months. I have practically experienced the change. I had a past. I was betrayed by a person. I created a lot of pain. It has been years now and I am with other person from 3 years who truly loves me. Past experience has changed me, I am suffering from strong insecurity and jealousy whenever it comes about his female friends. It has been the major reason for our fights till now. I try to control each and every situation according to me so that no bad repeats. I get offended for small scenes wherever I feel neglected even if it may not be the reality. I don't want any female friend of his to be close to him. He knows my past and sufferings. He hear me out when I feel low again, but now he decides what he wants and leave it a choice for me to accept. I feel alone when he leaves me to deal with it. Most importantly I am not able to trust him even if I want to. I have created hurt, cried a lot. Sometimes I really feel it would have been better if I was alone. I don't want to be dependent on him emotionally. I want to stay away from him so that I can focus on myself instead of expecting love and attention. I know these are very basics of life but I find it difficult to let go without hurting myself. Can you please help me out to overcome these negative feelings of insecurity and jealousy? Do you think staying away will help? Please guide me a way so that I stop hitting on myself weakening my soul.
Your letter is received and read. Here is the response.
You discussed that you are married since some 3 years, and you feel they love you. Then you also created jealousy and hurt. Then you felt that it was better to be alone.
OK. Now the most important is: You have realised that you made a mistake by depending on other soul for love and happiness.
We daily study and experience through Raja Yog, that I the soul is peace, is love and is power myself. I AM EVERYTHING THAT I NEED.
1. You will see that peace and love is our identity, our own inner nature. But as time has passed, body consciousnes has come and we forgot ourself as the Soul. Hence we also forgot our own nature. Then we began to search outside. There are 8 powers within Soul: https://www.brahma-kumaris.com/8-powers-of-soul
There are 7 virtues of Soul: www.brahma-kumaris.com/7-virtues-of-soul
(do visit to read above pages, then come back here)
2. When you experience yourself, then there is NO doubt. Right now you are searching for love, acceptance, etc. These you DO NOT NEED. You just need Self realisation. That is the key to unlimited: Soul - Who am i?: https://www.brahma-kumaris.com/who-am-i-the-soul
Practice Raja Yog meditation for only 21 days and see the difference. Learn Raja Yog here: https://www.brahma-kumaris.com/rajyoga-meditation
Hope you follow all steps as given. Go and read the knowledge, and then learn meditation. You do this for yourself. Just 21 days of sincere surrender to God.
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